Obituary of Lily Ting

Lily Li-Yu Ting, age 94, of Short Hills, died peacefully on Monday, October 23, 2023 surrounded by her loving family. She lived a full and purposeful life, and was a loving mother, treasured grandmother and devoted sister.

Lily is survived by her two sons, James Ting and his wife Beatrice Long of Short Hills & David Ting and his wife Li Hwa of Shanghai; two cherished grandchildren, Darren Ting & Bonnie Ting, five siblings, William Mao (Mary), Wan Yu Mao Chao, Chung-Yen Mao (Bill Farmer), Julie Tzou (Dar Tzou) and Yu Yu Mao (Joe Eng); many nieces and nephews; and many dear friends. 

She was predeceased by her beloved husband of 67 years, Francis Ting; and her brothers-in-law, Chuan Wei Chao, Ting Shi Jun, Ting Shi Yong, Ting Shi Ze, Ting Wan Zen, Ting Shi Yu, and Ting Wan Qing.

Lily's journey began on August 5, 1929, in Nanjing, China, where she was born to her late father, Yung Mao, and mother, Gao Qian Wu. As a young girl, she resided in Nanjing alongside her five siblings. However, the family's life took a significant turn when the Japanese invasion of Nanjing in 1937 forced them to relocate to the Sichuan province. They traversed various cities before eventually settling in the city of Chongqing in 1942.

Lily's father, Yung Mao, was the eldest son in a well-to-do Changzhou City family, excelling academically and earning an M.S. in Agriculture Development from the University of California, Berkeley in 1924. He made significant contributions to China's agricultural industry after returning from the U.S.

With the conclusion of World War II in 1945, the family returned to Nanjing. Being the eldest child, Lily assumed the role of caretaker for her five younger siblings, always ensuring their well-being. Her siblings knew they could depend on her. Lily also pursued her education, attending the prestigious Jinling Women College for two years.

In 1949, due to the political changes, the family had to move once again, this time to Hong Kong. During her time in Hong Kong, Lily made the difficult decision to discontinue her college education in order to work and help support the family.

In 1951, the family embarked on a new chapter, settling in Taiwan. It was in Taiwan that Lily met her beloved husband, the late Francis Ting. Her employment with the USAID Weather Bureau not only provided a livelihood but also introduced her to international friendships. Together, Lily and Francis welcomed the joys of parenthood with the birth of their two sons, David and James Ting.

In Taiwan, family bonds remained close, with Lily's family always residing next door to her parents. They even removed a shared wall between the houses, creating a harmonious extended family environment.

In 1971, the Ting family immigrated to the United States and settled in Fresh Meadows, Queens.  Lily quickly found employment at Chase Manhattan Bank in New York City, where she worked as an executive assistant for over two decades till she retired in 1994.  She and Francis raised two sons, both went on to have beautiful families and live productive lives.

Lily's selflessness left a lasting impression on those close to her. She consistently placed the needs of others above her own. When her son James had to drive across the country for graduate school and his car was out of commission, Lily generously offered her own, nicer car without a moment's hesitation to help him make the journey.

In 1999, Lily and Francis moved to Millburn, New Jersey, three minutes away from their newly born grandson, Darren.  In Millburn, Lily entered one of the happiest phases of her life, during which she dedicated many years to caring for Darren. Every week, once or twice after school, Lily and Darren strolled across Taylor Park to a small comic book store. There, Darren would select a Godzilla or a Power Ranger figure, and Lily would joyfully purchase it for him. Most weekends and holidays were filled with gatherings at James's home, relishing diverse cuisines and developing a taste for wine.

Some of Lily's most cherished moments took place when her granddaughter, Bonnie, came to visit from Shanghai, along with their eldest son, David, and his wife, Lily. Lily would glow with happiness and pride as she spent quality time with her sons, daughters-in-law, and the two grandchildren. These family gatherings were filled with warmth and love, creating lasting memories that brought immense joy to Lily's heart.  

During their retirement, Lily and Francis embarked on extensive travels, exploring various countries and regions across Europe, the United States, and Asia. Hawaii held a special place in her heart, often described as a true paradise. Besides her family, Lily had another passion: her mini–eskimo, Lulu. Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet, nor hail shall keep Lily and Lulu from their daily appointed walks through Taylor Park.  When it came to her favorite food, nothing could top sweets. Her legendary feat of finishing a two-pound bag of kisses in a day and her unwavering love for cake or cookies are well-known. 

Beyond her immediate family, Lily held a special place in the hearts of her beloved siblings, nieces and nephews. Major holidays frequently brought about large family gatherings, with her sisters Julie and Yuyu showcasing their culinary talents by preparing incredible dishes, many of which were cherished family recipes passed down through generations.

Lily was consistently kind, optimistic, and diligent, and she frequently shared valuable life lessons such as, "Always do your very best," and "It's more important to compete against yourself than against others." She also believed in the philosophy that "Whatever will be will be." Most importantly, Lily didn't merely speak these principles but exemplified them in her daily life, teaching her sons the essence of caring and selflessness through her actions. Making others happy was the primary source of joy in her life.

Lily will be deeply missed by all who knew and loved her.  

Relatives and friends are kindly invited to attend a visitation for Lily on Friday, November 10, 2023 from 4:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m. at the Madison Memorial Home, 159 Main Street, Madison, NJ 07940. 

A memorial service will be held on Saturday, November 11, 2023 at 11:00 a.m. at the funeral home. 

Cremation will be held privately for the family.

In lieu of flowers, charitable contributions may be made in Lily’s memory to A Living Tribute, https://www.alivingtribute.org/.